Summer vacation

The Wolfeboro Project: Survival Tips
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The Wolfeboro Project: Survival Tips

When you take on a new house project – especially a fixer – your tip list grows quickly. Despite bouts of fear and sticker-shock, we are still on the road to a home we already love in a town we are quickly growing more and more attached to.

Let’s get right to the tips – based on our missteps, lessons learned and a sprinkling of luck.

  1. Three Ps remain the mantra: patience, persistence and perspective – making measured, informed  decisions result in the project moving along at a pace that works with your budget and schedule. Trust your gut – if you have a shadow of a doubt on a decision, think it through again.
  2. Stick to the plan: we decided to work on this house from the outside-in. While we continue to talk about the ultimate interior renovations, other than some paint and a few window treatments, we are not planning a major investment on the interior until the outside is in shape – or close to it.
  3. Under-play your fixer – your family will be pleasantly surprised. We have told our families that we have a lot of work ahead; deferred maintenance are the words the Realtors used in describing the house (former owned didn’t do much at all to improve or even maintain the house). When our families visited the house this past month, they practically scolded us for describing the house as we have. They, too see the possibilities and  good bones of the house. Their collective responses amount to, “You made the house sound awful; it’s really lovely.” Of course, it’s not their project – but it is good to know we are not crazy and we have their support!
  4. Small-town, small steps. Figure out your possible DIY projects. In a small town – or any town – you can find someone to do anything for you – but you will pay in time and of course, money. Getting on a contractor’s small-town schedule takes finesse; be flexible and communicate with each contractor.
  5. Be specific: when  dealing with your contractor’s estimate continue to do research and ask people for help and advice. Doug reached out to his brother for advice since he had done major remodeling; we compared and contrasted details in estimates and asked contractors to provide more details. Be sure you have a timeline – or at least a finish date. Your two month-long project can stretch to months and months if you do not stay on top of details.
  6. Don’t be afraid to say, “No:”we nixed one project one of our contractors quoted because of price and the cross-over with another project and contractor. When in doubt put the brakes on.
  7. BREATHE: remember why you started this journey. Every day I love and enjoy this house and this town more. Every little DIY task or decision leads us to what will become our very special place. We continue to enjoy the lake, hiking, biking, boating. water-skiing, sailing; town concerts and cultural events; the local gym and shops; amazing lobster, ice cream and food that just tastes better here; getting to know people in town and spending time with them and becoming part of this community.

Those are seven tips for now; there are probably many more to come. With a full month under our belts here, we are heading back to our other home shortly. That will bring the inevitable culture shock (I haven’t waited a traffic light or been in a traffic jam for weeks!). We have a better idea of what to expect at this Happy Place; we have some big projects coming up at this house and we’ll be popping up for brief stays throughout the coming months. Being on this journey with an amazing husband and great family and friend support leaves me content and ever-hopeful of what this home will be in a few years.

The Wolfeboro Project: 3 Bids and a Headache
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The Wolfeboro Project: 3 Bids and a Headache

At the beginning of this journey, I realized the three Ps: patience, persistence and perspective. Now, I just need a cocktail.

Sunset during July 4th week
Oh, the view
July 4th in Wolfeboro
The quintessential Independence Day parade
The quintessential Independence Day parade
The lawn chair brigade – really!
A spectacular town parade filled with red, white and blue
Imagine a screened porch…

The good news is we love, love love the Long Stack house and its potential. We thoroughly enjoyed spending the July 4th holiday at Long Stack and experienced Wolfeboro in all its red, white and blue glory. We took a couple of swims at Brewster Beach in between working, cleaning, fixing and shopping. Plus we had lovely meals and of course a few runs for ice cream.

We’re managing two homes that are more than six hours apart. Any major life change involves adjustments, but sometimes, I’m just so confused! Thank goodness I took photos of some of my clothes in the Long Stack closet or I would not remember where some of my clothes are. I did the same thing with the kitchen pantry. So, if I wonder whether I need cinnamon at Long Stack because I have two containers of the spice here in Cherry Hill; I just go to the photo. So not only do I have cinnamon at Long Stack, I have a container and a half here in Cherry Hill. Oy!

Today’s title refers to the contractors who are preparing bids for landscaping and a screened porch we plan to add to the deck. Three contractors spent about an hour-and-a-half each with us at Long Stack considering and measuring for the project. One landscaper (the others I reached out to did not return calls or emails) is preparing an estimate for clean-up work necessary around our nearly two-acres of property.

Did I forget to mention the septic issue? About $500 later, our septic is more-or-less cleared out. There was a bit of a stoppage (it was constipated, my sweet husband quips) – fortunately, nothing major. It seems our septic tank had probably NEVER been cleaned out in 40 years! Are these homeowners crazy? It’s hard to believe people can live in a house and think that nothing needs to be cared for. Fortunately, that has ended with us in the house.

Meantime, we still have no decision on a new washer-dryer and refrigerator. Every time I open the fridge or press the ‘on’ button for the washer, I think I’m going to see sparks. Hopefully, my fear and loathing will subside.

We have begun to seriously think about getting out of the Cherry Hill house. It may take a year or two, but enough already; between the upkeep and crazy-high taxes, it’s time.

For now, I look forward to a month in New Hampshire – working and some vacation time  – while hoping that our son can check on Cherry Hill and make sure nothing happens while we are at Long Stack. Cross your fingers for us – we need some good luck.

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Back at my happy place

You know when you are going through a painful dentist appointment or facing an unpleasant situation you try to put your mind at ease by thinking about something happy? New Hampshire is my happy place. I have many happy places, but this week, I get to revisit many of my happy places with my family and on my own. This afternoon, we picked up Adam’s buddy, Andrew at Manchester airport. Even that experience was a “happy place moment.” Manchester-Boston Regional Airport (MHT) is one of the finest small airports I’ve been in.

You can arrive from Philly, get your luggage, rent your car and be on the road in under 30-minutes. Andrew arrived from his first solo commercial flight with a big smile on his face and thrilled he was in New England for this vacation. A quick stop for lunch on the way to our vacation rental house, then groceries and we were unpacking on Danforth Bay off Lake Ossipee about 3 pm. Adam and Andrew took the first dives in the lake; Doug inflated the water toys; I unpacked and was not far behind them. I floated in a raft for about 45 minutes. The usual first vacation dinner of pasta, sausage, salad and garlic bread was enjoyed on the screened porch of our waterfront cottage. NHDanforthBay_20090816_01NHDanforthBay_20090816_04

OK, cell phones work here..sometimes

OK, cell phones work here..sometimes

 Now the sun is starting to slip below Mary’s Mountain.

Frappes for the boys

Frappes for the boys

 There are still some speed boats with a wakeboarder cutting through the smooth bay water. The air is still and it’s warm. But it’s nothing like the humidity and discomfort you feel at home. NHMonboating_20090816_01Once the sun sets, a cool breeze will envelope the White Mountains and we’ll settle in to watch the Phillies game on ESPN tonight. First, it’s ice cream at Cozy Corner in the tiny town of Freedom. OK, maybe another adult beverage as well. Sweet dreams from Danforth Bay.

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Vacation is..forgetting what day of the week it is.

I often wonder what stratosphere vacation falls in. You can go through every work day knowing exactly what time it is, what task is underway, what comes next, what is on the next day’s “to-do” list. Start your vacation and everything revolves around trying to make the day last longer.

This vacation day wasn’t particularly notable or unique, but I had to keep thinking, “Is today Thursday or Friday?” Doug and I walked out into the morning dew with a light fog hovering over the fields. Our morning exercise took us about two miles from the house. We noticed the homes for sale; discovered that pianist George Shearing lives in one of the houses I’ve been walking past for years. I looked deep into the meadows to the left and right hoping to see the family of deer that once bolted across Devon Road mere yards in front of me, creating a vision that will always be in my mind’s eye. On this day, it was a great conversation with Doug about life, home, relationships and more. It’s amazing what you can get done in an hour.

Sweet Larissa before dinner

Sweet Larissa before dinner

Later in the day while Doug worked on his mom’s “honey-do” list around her house, Adam finally

Sketch by Carol Kardon of First Congregational Church of Lee, MA

Sketch by Carol Kardon of First Congregational Church of Lee, MA

got up. We went into town to pick up a few things. He finally was hungry for lunch. So I had a lovely conversation and some food while sitting on the restaurant porch. We looked across the street where the historic First Congregational Church of Lee has stood in several different forms since the 1700’s. The church has one of the tallest steeples in New England and looks just like the one that sits in the middle of the wide shot of the opening of the 1960’s night time soap opera Peyton Place. We noticed the paint literally falling off the church and worse yet, the top of the steeple is rotted away. Adam said we should cross the street after lunch to take a closer look after lunch. As we walked in the shade of the old trees lining the sidewalk leading to the church which sits just behind town hall, Adam said that he really liked the feel of the small town. We read the sign that has been posted in front of the church indicating that it has qualified for an emergency grant to restore the facility. There’s no indication work will start any time soon. In fact, it appears they have an interim pastor whose name isn’t even posted on the sign outside the church. The tall windows gracing the sides of the church are cracked and crying for attention. Every inch of the outside seems to be peeling away inch by inch. Church members of the sexton have made every effort to make the place welcoming to all by putting big, potted plants outside. But the facility is just so sad looking. The restoration will take many hundreds of thousands of dollars. I hope the next time I visit, we see scaffolding and work crew who will skillfully bring back the First CongregationalChurch of Lee back to its glory. The building was twice destroyed by fire; now it is being destroyed by time. Adam noted, “At least the clock on the church still works.”  http://www.ucc-lee.org/history.asp

Family time today brought more family to my mother-in-law’s. First the afternoon was filled with puttering around the house and conversation about family; who did what to who and expectations of things to come. Dinner was a zoo!  Burgers and dogs on the grill may sound simple enough, but when you factor in three young cousins, a teenager and seven adults. It gets very loud. The New England mosquitoes decided to kick into overdrive, so plans for dinner on the patio evolved into  finding a place at the table. There’s nothing like watching our son totally entertain his three young cousins. They couldn’t get enough of him. Dessert was followed by quick good-byes. The little ones needed to go to sleep at their nearby hotel with their mom and dad.NHLeeMA_20090814_08

Sleep on vacation is nothing like day-to-day. Dreams are more pleasant; sleep is more sound and waking up brings that, “What’s next” feeling. Tomorrow is…Saturday; What’s next?

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Why this summer is different from all other summers.

 We’re seeing and hearing words including “staycation” and “vacation stimulus” when it comes to the summer of 2009.  For the lucky people NOT affected by the economy, there may be that trip to Italy or a cruise to Alaska. They should find terrific bargains, a real bonus given their prosperous circumstances. The FEAR that has enveloped many others who are still hanging on to their jobs or are fairly certain they’ll survive any cutbacks, has led to a more austere rest period this summer. The vacations are shorter, not as far, not as grand and this can be a very good thing.
Adam & camp friends 2008

Adam & camp friends 2008

Several weeks ago, we had to deliver the unpopular decision to our son, that summer camp in New Hampshire would have to be cut in half. The cost has risen steadily every year since he started going to the overnight camp six years ago. This year was no different, but the change in my job status gave us pause on spending such a huge sum of money. Of course, Adam was devastated. He’s made incredible bonds with these kids for six years and didn’t want his time cut back. We also cut our planned two-week stay at a small, rented house in New Hampshire in August, in half. It’s all good. Here’s why:

I’m realizing there were so many things I took for granted.  Believe me, it was nice to not think too much about the bottom line when it came to everyday purchases, but living just a little bit smaller has led to more family meals at home (not that we ate out that much anyway), as well as a true appreciation for the days and evenings we go out with friends, family and to the Phillies games. I had paid for our Phillies tickets weeks before I lost my job, so I just looked at that money as “outta here,” (as the late Harry Kalas would say). The games are my night or day out. Maybe we eat in before going to the game instead of spending $30 or $40 on dinner. There are treats at the game. Perhaps ice cream or cotton candy for my son, but no extras. I bring soft pretzels and peanuts. And that’s OK. Nothing can spoil the joy I get from watching my boys of summer scratch and claw for every win.

My Neighbor Joanne on her birthday at the ballpark

My Neighbor Joanne on her birthday at the ballpark

Having this time to revamp, redefine and revisit WHO I am is probably a good thing. I see the faces of people and read the stories of desperate people taking desperate measures and it melts my heart. Losing your home, your job, your car, your friends and more is a burden no one should have to bear. But we survivors are resilient. I’m learning every day that sun comes up, that I have a calling to find another path and another way to serve. Don’t get me wrong: I adored working in radio news. I’m a news junkie and always will be. But I always thought about what else I could do. Now, I’m just beginning to find out as What’s Next Productions gets underway. There is so much to do. I’ll trip a bunch of times, I’m sure, but in the end, it’s all about how my years in journalism can help small and mid-sized businesses, non-profit groups and others find ways to raise their profile in the public eye.

Finally, spending time at home has made me realize how lucky I am to HAVE this home. We worked hard to get here. Fortunately, we bought our place some time ago and have about 11 years left on the mortgage. My vegetable garden is sprouting; I’m getting more time to week the flower beds and I love watching the many varieties of birds at our feeders in the yard. (Now if the piles to file in my office would just disappear, things would be even more fabulous.) We joined the neighborhood swim club again, so it’ll be nice to have a place to chill out that is just a short walk away.

For people who need to find some peace this summer, rediscover what is right in your own back yard: the historic sites that are just a short drive away; a nearby lake, the beach; neighborhood garage sales on the weekend; an evening with the nieghbors playing board games or just talking over adult beverages. The list is endless.  Find happiness amid these tough times, because it is a prescription for success in getting through this. You will find your new normal.